But That Doesn’t Work for Me


Here’s part of one reader’s comment after reading one of my menu plans

I don’t menu plan, because it seems to actually impair my ability to cook. :) Whenever I have done it over the course of our 10 years of marriage I have actually cooked less and become a big disgruntled, grumpy wife. I get discouraged that this is something that helps so many, so I wonder what is wrong with me. but–then my hubby just comes in and says, ‘just don’t make a list’. Brilliant man, that husband of mine!

You know I can’t live without my menu plan. (Well, I can live…we just don’t eat very well without my menu plan.)  And the above commenter doesn’t feed her family as well with a menu plan. I’m so glad she was honest in her comment.

Guess what? Not everything that works for one person will work for everyone else. And WE DON’T NEED TO FEEL GUILTY ABOUT IT.

God made us all different.  On purpose. He is very wise like that.

I LOVE this blogging world we are all a part of and I think it’s such a wonderful way to help each other and encourage each other and share the things we know with each other. But you all are a lot better than I am at all kinds of things. If I let myself, I could become discouraged about all the things I read about that you’re doing that I’m not doing.

For instance:

  1. I haven’t made scrapbooks for my kids. I’ve barely written in their baby books.
  2. Spelling is not my strong soot. Suite. Suit. Whatever.  Spelling duzn’t come naturally to me. I use spell check a lot and even then I stil mes up.
  3. I am very directionally challenged. I will never know where “west” is, so don’t ask me to point to it.
  4. I can’t get my bathrooms to smell good for longer than five minutes. (It’s a boy thing.)
  5. I am terrible about hanging my clothes up at the end of the day.
  6. I haven’t pulled out my sewing machine to make anything (or repair anything) for months.   Who am I kidding?  Years.
  7. There are crumbs surrounding my computer. 
  8. I hate reading directions and fine print.
  9. I seem to have some sort of phobia about learning a foreign language and have never made it past Pig Latin.
  10. Driving a stick shift vehicle makes me break out in hives. Simply typing the words “stick shift vehicle” makes me break out in hives. And I also hate driving in big cities. In any vehicle.

I could keep going with that list, but you need to get on with your day.

My point is this:  If menu planning…or anything else someone encourages you to do doesn’t work for you…that’s okay. :)

I think it’s great to learn from each other. But if you finish reading a blog post or visiting with someone and are left thinking,  “Oh dear…I am so much less of a woman because I failed to alphabetize and color code the dry beans in my pantry…but when am I supposed to find time for that because I really need to sit down with my two year old and teach him to fluently write and speak German by 2:00 this afternoon…” then maybe you should give yourself a little break. 

Ask yourself the following questions that apply to you…

  • Am I being lazy or am I being a hard worker?
  • Am I doing what God wants me to be doing?
  • Am I doing what my husband wants me to be doing?
  • Am I taking care of my children the way I should be taking care of them?

Use your God given gifts and let other people use theirs. Take care of your family the way you feel God is calling you to take care of your family. Read and learn and be challenged by what people write and share…but only do what works for you and what you feel God wants for you. God calls you to be you…and that’s it!

Care to share? I’d love to hear something you’re really good at…and something you’d rather leave to someone else!! Like maybe I could come plan your menu  for you and you could drive me around in big cities?

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  1. Lynda says

    I have suspected for some time now that you and I might be kindred spirits! (to quote Anne Shirley!) I cannot drive a stick shift. Well, I technically can, I can get it going, and can do kind of well on flat roads. But with any kind of hill, or going backwards – forget it! A couple of years ago, my husband bought a stick shift car, and I tried to drive it. My kids loved it when I drove it because I would squeal the tires every time I tried to get it into first. It got to the point where I refused to drive it. It was like being back to a one car family when the van needed work or something. So he got rid of it. However, just recently he bought a car of the same make and model as the other car, and every time I drive it, it will freak me out, because it sounds the same as the other one, and I start to panic, thinking that I will have to get it into first gear after the light changes, or up that hill!! And big cities? Forget about it! I even get nervous in big towns! :D

    Thank you for this post!


  2. Lyn says

    Very nice post, thank you. I am an older homemaker and still feel the same applies. No, I don’t have little ones to chase around but I do have health issues and that makes life very challenging.

    I stopped feeling the very same way you expressed about blogs a long time ago. It could easily be discouraging not having a show-palace home, or not being organized in everything I do, or not being the best homemaker in the world, or a gourmet cook, etc., etc. I don’t think women should be so competitive with themselves and others. It just doesn’t really matter in life. Like you said, all that matters is that we be the best that we can be, and God knows all of our abilities as well as limitations.


  3. Julie says

    I don’t use a menu plan either. I have a list of the foods we eat on my fridge and I make sure I have the ingredents for them. Then we just pick what we want to eat. It works well for us. If I make a menu my husband says ” that doesn’t sound good” or “I don’t want that. This way we decide in the morning and everyone is happy .


    Joyce@Joyful Creations at Home Reply:

    Good idea. I usually make a menu, but it has basically the same things
    on it every week. Just might switch around the days. I like this idea
    Thanks for sharing.


  4. Amy says

    Laura, I think we were separated at birth (I just spelled separated seperated and spell check came through for me :o). Every single thing you listed is on target with me! My husband even offered to pay me $200 to learn to drive his stick shift and I wouldn’t do it. I don’t do directions just give me landmarks and names of roads. I despise reading instructions and I totally depend on my hubby for that.
    Just had to share,
    Amy :o)


  5. says

    I use a menu plan every week, but it usually has pretty much the same meals on it every week. I used to feel bad because I was not giving my family “variety” and then I realized they don’t really want variety. They like routine and knowing they will get to eat their favs once a week:)


  6. kentucky Lady 717 says

    OMG….Laura and Amy, we must be like peas in a pod….everything you guys listed , I also could have listed too so I will just say DITTO to you both…..
    A great article, enjoyed it very much…..now I will go watch Dr. OZ :) and learn how to stay healthy…..right after I finish my BON BONS tho :) Just ate 2 and 2 Petit Fours…….:)


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