I have written this post four times and deleted all four drafts. Nothing like wasting an entire day. Let’s try for a fifth time, shall we?
Here’s the deal:
I’ve been seeing a natural doctor for four and a half years. She specializes in detoxification (getting to the root of our health isues). I originally went to see her because my migraines were getting worse (twice a month for three days each) and because every winter since 1992 I have landed in bed with pneumonia because of weak lungs.
I needed help beyond “eat right, drink water, and exercise.”
Detoxing my physical self ultimately led to detoxing my emotional self. Phew. I had no idea that the physical and emotional are so connected. I had no idea how difficult this journey would be. But I’ve gratefully learned incredible truths about God’s power and my need to surrender, so as tough as the past four years have been, I am so thankful for all he has revealed and what he continues to teach me.
Well, somewhere through all of this detoxing, as many of you know, my body started to hate sugary desserts. Then it started to hate grains and carbs. Then it stopped being able to tolerate fruit.
Most of this is a good problem to have. I didn’t have to muster up the will power to quit my sugar addition. I simply didn’t want to keep feeling the miserable brain fog and migraines the sugar caused. I felt horrible when I ate sugar and carbs, so I quit.
The problem for me came when, after cutting out all the foods that made me not feel well (I was down to meat, vegetables, and fat), I still wasn’t feeling well. (At this point, my digestive system was healthy and healed. The problem had something to do with a bad bacteria in my blood stream not playing nice with anything resembling sugar/carbs. I was sugar crashing after eating almost everything. It was so, so awful.)
I did have some good days here and there. But overall, after so many years of eating so many healthy foods, drinking a good amount of water, going to a natural doctor, and trying to exercise – and still not feeling great – this is what I said more than once:
What even is the point?! I may as well go back to my Pepsi and Poptart days. I’m working so hard, cutting out all these foods, spending money on a good doctor, all so I can feel worse than ever.
The only thing that kept me from giving in to that despair was knowing that if I actually caved in and started eating junk again, I would feel worse than worse. I’d come too far in my journey to go back. But still. I was so, so discouraged.
Now, everyone is different so what has worked for me is in no way a prescription for anyone else. But here’s what I will tell you about the latest venture on my health-seeking journey:
While continuing to see my detox doctor, in January I reached out to a therapist for help with my emotional health. Both my doctor and my therapist are Christians, and I wouldn’t have it any other way, seeing as I was dealing with quite a few delicate issues. My Christian therapist has helped identify many of my struggles and the lies I was believing from the Enemy. She has helped me get rid of the lies and replace them with God’s truth. I have so much good to say about this, because my friends, I was really, really struggling in every way – and GOD IS SETTING ME FREE.
I believe I was being attacked spiritually during the past several months, causing terrible physical ailments, depression, and major feelings of defeat. Do with that what you will. But the truth is that as the chains that were holding me in bondage are falling off, my physical symptoms and my emotional state are clearing too.
This makes me weep with joy. It’s been a rough four and a half years. I don’t want to be the girl I was before this journey began, but neither would I ever want to re-live the struggles of this season in my life.
I thank God continually for how he is setting me free! I thank him for leading me to my natural doctor and to the therapist who is helping to finish what was started four and a half years ago. (Not that our journey will ever be finished on this earth. But there is hope, and I am finding it. Praise Him!)
So where am I now? And more importantly, can I eat cookies again? (That was my boys’ question after I came home from my last detox doc appointment and she’d pronounced me healthy and strong!)
I’ve really gotten quite used to eating such a clean diet of meat, veggies, and fat, so I don’t even want cookies. But my body no longer hates grains and fruit, so I can eat them in moderation, which is all I really want. I have no intention of going overboard, but it’s nice not to have so many restrictions so if I want a piece of pizza sometime, I will eat one.
As for now, I plan to take everything a day at a time.
I’ve learned during this journey how much I desperately need time with Jesus, praying and reading the Word every day if possible. (Remembering Truth to dis-spell the lies is difficult if I’m not frequently reading the Truth.)
I’ve learned that reaching out for help is absolutely necessary and really quite beautiful. Yes, God alone is all we need. But we also need our Christian family and friends to love us through struggles. And if He is making it clear that He has provided help from trustworthy professionals, then we should not hold back from utilizing those resources too.
My friends: What would have happened if I would have gone back to Pepsi and Poptarts as I’d been tempted to do? I don’t even want to thing about it. I think if I had not been nourishing my body as well as I was during this dark time I would have sunk deeper into the pit and had an even harder time pulling out.
Phew, what a great God we serve!
My journey isn’t over, and neither is yours. Our journey doesn’t end until life ends. Our job is to seek Him and trust His promises to always provide for us.
If you ever feel discouraged about “trying so hard” and “eating so well” and still you don’t achieve the results you’re hoping for, don’t give up. Don’t cave in and go back to a lifestyle of junk food or whatever temporary “fix” that might sound appealing. Seek help prayerfully and confidently. Keep taking care of yourself with wisdom.
Thank you for being my faithful friends. Thank you for allowing me to share this journey with you. I am blessed because of each of you.
This leads me to an invitation, because I can’t think of a more fitting way to enjoy this fresh, new start…
Join me for another April Health Challenge?
Many of us did this together last year and found it to be a fantastic way to connect and encourage one another. Let’s do it again and get even more people on board!
You might be at a great point in your life, or you might be at a point of struggle, or you might be somewhere in between. Wherever you are, we can all use a boost to take another baby step toward doing something good for our health.
Me? Well, after so many months of feeling awful and finally regaining (mostly) consistent energy, I’m ready to start a more regular (though, gentle) exercise routine.
You might be ready to start drinking more water. Or maybe you want to challenge yourself to eat more veggies each day. Maybe you want to spend more time in the Word or in prayer. Or maybe you need something more and it’s time to prayerfully consider reaching out for extra help to get your health on track.
This is for every aspect of our health – physical, emotional, spiritual. It all goes together and it’s all ridiculously important.
It’s free. It’s low maintenance. It’s just a bunch of friends giving high fives and you can do its and I understands and hows it goings.
Over 500 people did this with me last year, and it was seriously so much fun and so encouraging! Everyone who joins gets this free mini-workbook to give you a jump start as we get the challenge started.
You get to make this what YOU need it to be. Feeling whole and healthy feels…really whole and healthy. I like it here. I want you to be a part of this with me!
Once you sign up, you’ll get an email asking you to confirm your subscription. Then you’ll get your free worksheets and a message from me. Can’t wait to get this started with you!
If you care to share in the comments: How’s your health journey? Where do you feel you could use the most encouragement right now?
We’d love to have you join us in taking this Surrendered Heart eCourse. It’s sure to be a wonderful blessing for your marriage!