We already covered the fact that Monday was National Pretzel Day.
But did you know that this upcoming Friday is National No Pants Day? I wish I were kidding. First of all, who came up with that? And how in the world was it approved as a national holiday? And what on earth is the purpose? To celebrate free will? To rebel against constricting legware? To save money on laundry detergent for a day?
If you can’t get into that holiday, perhaps you’ll like Saturday’s holiday better. It’s National Stay Up All Night Celebration. Yeah, I can make it until about 10 pm and then my sentences no longer make sense and my eyes start to glaze over. Staying up all night does not work for me. I can’t do it. But if you want to, go right ahead. It’s a National Holiday after all.
Last Friday was National Hairball Awareness Day. I am quite aware that hairballs exist. I’ve seen cats cough them up and it isn’t pretty. I’m not sure how much more aware of hairballs I need to be. Perhaps I have been in denial of how many hairballs there really are in this Nation of ours. I feel slightly ashamed of my lack of attention toward the matter.
While we’re on the subject of cats, did you know that there’s a What If Cats And Dogs Had Opposable Thumbs Day? Yep. It does make you pause to take a moment and reflect on the possiblity, doesn’t it? Okay, I’m all done reflecting. Moving on…
Oh wow – another cat day. Sure enough, December 15 is National Cat Herders Day. I’ve herded cows before and have found that it is not easy for me. I can’t imagine herding a bunch of cats. And by the way, where are we trying to get them walk together in unison? While I don’t really want to participate in herding a group of cats into one specific place, if you are planning to do it, please call me because I’d kinda like to watch.
There was a day in January in which Rid the World of Fad Diets and Gimmicks Day was celebrated. Yeah, I’m pretty sure it was not highly effective.
The last day of the year is apparently Make Up Your Mind Day. Should I celebrate it though? I can’t decide. I keep going back and forth on that one.
There is also a National No Interupptions Day. While I would love for my children to celebrate this day – every day- I can’t help but think of the insanity of not being able to interrupt a radio or TV show with an important announcement. “We interrupt this broadcast to inform you of a severe weather alert. Oh WAIT, never mind! It’s No Interupptions Day. Go about your business. Take care.”
Well, use your best judgement about National No Pants Day coming up next Friday. I may stay home all day, just to play it safe. Because while I certainly don’t want to go around without my pants, I really don’t want to see you without yours.