Ok, Ladies. Today we’re gonna get real. Is it too much information? I don’t think so. I think this is worth discussing candidly. (At least today I’m not mentioning my gas. Be proud.)
So here we go.
One of my claims to fame is that I’m a great multi-tasker. This is especially apparent at my house, I believe, because I live in a household with five men and I am the lone female. So while each of my men-folk are often focusing on, and executing, one task at a time, I’m over in the kitchen knocking out twelve.
I’ve always seen this as a blessing for productivity but lately, not so much.
My brain is tired.
Matt can multi-task too, but he’s also much better at focusing than I am. Sometimes I watch Matt doing his one thing, thinking of only that one thing, not hearing the kids arguing in the background, not noticing the grime under the cabinet, not considering a potential problem with the plans we made for tomorrow, not seeing the stuff on the stairs that needs to be taken up and put away – and I’m like, “Man, I wish I could do that.”
I really do. Sometimes I long for the ability to just be in the moment, instead of thinking of past moments, potential moments, just in case moments, long term moments, and also dinner every night for the rest of our lives.
My brain wears me out sometimes. I want it to sssshhhhh every once in a while. Is this just me? Is your brain as loud as mine?
God wired women and men differently, on purpose, for a purpose. This is a good thing. Figuratively speaking, men’s brains are usually better at “pulling out one drawer at a time, closing it, then pulling out another.” Meanwhile, we women might find ourselves with all of our drawers pulled open at once, with items overflowing and toppling out, sometimes struggling to find where one ends and the other begins.
Both gifts are beneficial. Both have their limitations. Truly God is good in how He makes us different, with strengths and weaknesses that compliment one another.
So, the multitasking…
I’m grateful for the ability to get several things done at once. I’m also grateful to be learning my need for regular rest periods so I can help keep my brain from overloading and exploding all over the living room.
But, still, why can I not shut down my brain every time I want to?! (And here’s where it gets real…)
There are times I’m making a grocery list, or a to-do list, or thinking of a good blog post topic, or perhaps all of the above…
In the bedroom. (What?!) Yes. And let’s just say there are no notebooks or pens around and this is not the time to be making a grocery list. Do you follow what I’m saying?
I thought something was wrong with me. I’d be fine and in the moment, then suddenly my brain would shift to “I need to be sure I don’t forget to pick up cat food.” I decided I belonged in Crazy Town.
I thought I was the only one who did this. After all, this isn’t something I discuss with my friends. Who wants to admit to any other human being that they sometimes choose the worst time in the world to start thinking about laundry detergent (also did I remember to sign my kids’ waver and get it in on time, how should I answer that email, and I wonder if the shoes got put away downstairs).
I have felt bad about this for years.
Then I made my way to Lesson Three in the Boost Your Libido eCourse I told you about recently – and suddenly Sheila was describing my brain as if she had been inside it (love her, be my new BFF, Sheila G.)! I did not know this but apparently, in regard to how a woman’s brain works:
I am normal.
Can you relate to any of this? Have you ever made a grocery list or any other list at the very wrong time?
Women do this naturally. It doesn’t mean something is wrong, and it definitely doesn’t mean that we should give up on special time with our husband (and instead head out to the grocery store).
What I love most about Sheila is that not only did she assure me that the way my brain works is normal, she followed up by giving tips to help my focus stay in the bedroom and off of the cat food. Her tips all make so much sense! I can do this! I am doing them, in fact.
So, my fellow multi-tasking friends – if you can relate to anything I just said, know that you are not alone, nor are you crazy.
Best news you’ve heard all day, huh?
I think it’s important to share truths like this with one another, even though it might feel a little bit awkward at first to bring it up. This is even better than talking about my gas, don’t you think?
I highly recommend the Boost Your Libido eCourse, which you can find here.
And while we’re on the topic of marriage, I will point you to a resource I created that has been fantastic for helping me love my husband God’s way: A Surrendered Heart. Get all the details about this Mini eCourse here.