I have written this post four times and deleted all four drafts. Nothing like wasting an entire day. Let’s try for a fifth time, shall we?
Here’s the deal:
I’ve been seeing a natural doctor for four and a half years. She specializes in detoxification (getting to the root of our health isues). I originally went to see her because my migraines were getting worse (twice a month for three days each) and because every winter since 1992 I have landed in bed with pneumonia because of weak lungs.
I needed help beyond “eat right, drink water, and exercise.”
Detoxing my physical self ultimately led to detoxing my emotional self. Phew. I had no idea that the physical and emotional are so connected. I had no idea how difficult this journey would be. But I’ve gratefully learned incredible truths about God’s power and my need to surrender, so as tough as the past four years have been, I am so thankful for all he has revealed and what he continues to teach me.
Well, somewhere through all of this detoxing, as many of you know, my body started to hate sugary desserts. Then it started to hate grains and carbs. Then it stopped being able to tolerate fruit.
Most of this is a good problem to have. I didn’t have to muster up the will power to quit my sugar addition. I simply didn’t want to keep feeling the miserable brain fog and migraines the sugar caused. I felt horrible when I ate sugar and carbs, so I quit.
The problem for me came when, after cutting out all the foods that made me not feel well (I was down to meat, vegetables, and fat), I still wasn’t feeling well. (At this point, my digestive system was healthy and healed. The problem had something to do with a bad bacteria in my blood stream not playing nice with anything resembling sugar/carbs. I was sugar crashing after eating almost everything. It was so, so awful.)
I did have some good days here and there. But overall, after so many years of eating so many healthy foods, drinking a good amount of water, going to a natural doctor, and trying to exercise – and still not feeling great – this is what I said more than once:
What even is the point?! I may as well go back to my Pepsi and Poptart days. I’m working so hard, cutting out all these foods, spending money on a good doctor, all so I can feel worse than ever.
The only thing that kept me from giving in to that despair was knowing that if I actually caved in and started eating junk again, I would feel worse than worse. I’d come too far in my journey to go back. But still. I was so, so discouraged.
Now, everyone is different so what has worked for me is in no way a prescription for anyone else. But here’s what I will tell you about the latest venture on my health-seeking journey:
While continuing to see my detox doctor, in January I reached out to a therapist for help with my emotional health. Both my doctor and my therapist are Christians, and I wouldn’t have it any other way, seeing as I was dealing with quite a few delicate issues. My Christian therapist has helped identify many of my struggles and the lies I was believing from the Enemy. She has helped me get rid of the lies and replace them with God’s truth. I have so much good to say about this, because my friends, I was really, really struggling in every way – and GOD IS SETTING ME FREE.
I believe I was being attacked spiritually during the past several months, causing terrible physical ailments, depression, and major feelings of defeat. Do with that what you will. But the truth is that as the chains that were holding me in bondage are falling off, my physical symptoms and my emotional state are clearing too.
This makes me weep with joy. It’s been a rough four and a half years. I don’t want to be the girl I was before this journey began, but neither would I ever want to re-live the struggles of this season in my life.
I thank God continually for how he is setting me free! I thank him for leading me to my natural doctor and to the therapist who is helping to finish what was started four and a half years ago. (Not that our journey will ever be finished on this earth. But there is hope, and I am finding it. Praise Him!)
So where am I now? And more importantly, can I eat cookies again? (That was my boys’ question after I came home from my last detox doc appointment and she’d pronounced me healthy and strong!)
I’ve really gotten quite used to eating such a clean diet of meat, veggies, and fat, so I don’t even want cookies. But my body no longer hates grains and fruit, so I can eat them in moderation, which is all I really want. I have no intention of going overboard, but it’s nice not to have so many restrictions so if I want a piece of pizza sometime, I will eat one.
As for now, I plan to take everything a day at a time.
I’ve learned during this journey how much I desperately need time with Jesus, praying and reading the Word every day if possible. (Remembering Truth to dis-spell the lies is difficult if I’m not frequently reading the Truth.)
I’ve learned that reaching out for help is absolutely necessary and really quite beautiful. Yes, God alone is all we need. But we also need our Christian family and friends to love us through struggles. And if He is making it clear that He has provided help from trustworthy professionals, then we should not hold back from utilizing those resources too.
My friends: What would have happened if I would have gone back to Pepsi and Poptarts as I’d been tempted to do? I don’t even want to thing about it. I think if I had not been nourishing my body as well as I was during this dark time I would have sunk deeper into the pit and had an even harder time pulling out.
Phew, what a great God we serve!
My journey isn’t over, and neither is yours. Our journey doesn’t end until life ends. Our job is to seek Him and trust His promises to always provide for us.
If you ever feel discouraged about “trying so hard” and “eating so well” and still you don’t achieve the results you’re hoping for, don’t give up. Don’t cave in and go back to a lifestyle of junk food or whatever temporary “fix” that might sound appealing. Seek help prayerfully and confidently. Keep taking care of yourself with wisdom.
Thank you for being my faithful friends. Thank you for allowing me to share this journey with you. I am blessed because of each of you.
This leads me to an invitation, because I can’t think of a more fitting way to enjoy this fresh, new start…
Join me for another April Health Challenge?
Many of us did this together last year and found it to be a fantastic way to connect and encourage one another. Let’s do it again and get even more people on board!
You might be at a great point in your life, or you might be at a point of struggle, or you might be somewhere in between. Wherever you are, we can all use a boost to take another baby step toward doing something good for our health.
Me? Well, after so many months of feeling awful and finally regaining (mostly) consistent energy, I’m ready to start a more regular (though, gentle) exercise routine.
You might be ready to start drinking more water. Or maybe you want to challenge yourself to eat more veggies each day. Maybe you want to spend more time in the Word or in prayer. Or maybe you need something more and it’s time to prayerfully consider reaching out for extra help to get your health on track.
This is for every aspect of our health – physical, emotional, spiritual. It all goes together and it’s all ridiculously important.
Sign up to join our April Health Challenge here.
It’s free. It’s low maintenance. It’s just a bunch of friends giving high fives and you can do its and I understands and hows it goings.
Over 500 people did this with me last year, and it was seriously so much fun and so encouraging! Everyone who joins gets this free mini-workbook to give you a jump start as we get the challenge started.
You get to make this what YOU need it to be. Feeling whole and healthy feels…really whole and healthy. I like it here. I want you to be a part of this with me!
Join the April Health Challenge here.
Once you sign up, you’ll get an email asking you to confirm your subscription. Then you’ll get your free worksheets and a message from me. Can’t wait to get this started with you!
If you care to share in the comments: How’s your health journey? Where do you feel you could use the most encouragement right now?
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We’d love to have you join us in taking this Surrendered Heart eCourse. It’s sure to be a wonderful blessing for your marriage!
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Rebekah says
Thank you so much for this post, it’s so encouraging. I am going through a somewhat similar struggle and it’s very frustrating. Especially when everyone else seems to eat junk all the time and still feel good. I am ready to have a steady stream of energy again and be pain free and be able to lose weight.
Tiffany says
Oh Laura, bless your dear heart. I commend you on your bravery for posting this. Prayers for you as you continue on your journey. I could just bawl reading this. Because someone GETS it! I’ve struggled for years much like you. I have an appointment with a doctor who specializes in complementary and alternative medicine coming up in a couple weeks. I’m just so tired of feeling so lousy all. the. time. Your story gives me hope. Thank you.
Nicole says
I am in month 2 of an anti-candida diet. Healing my gut, adrenals, and thyroid. Also healing my soul through Revelation Wellness Instructor training. I get this…..all of it! Body and soul are sooooo connected! So looking forward to being healthy and whole again, then passing what I’ve learned on to overs. It’s a painful raw process, but oh so worth it! So glad you are seeing healing!!!!
Melissa Jackson says
Thank you for sharing this. I had been exercising and watching what I eat this past fall and had lost almost 10 pounds and felt SO much better. Then holidays and much sickness. I have 4 kids so even if I wasn’t sick, I had to manage a lot of middle of the night fevers, night terrors, etc. Needless to say the weight came back and so did the lack of energy. I am excited for some encouragement and knowledge of knowing that I am not the only one wanting to change. And the reminder to ask the One who made my body to help me was so good.
Casey says
I’m thankful you were able to post this! I have barely if started my health journey and I’m ready to give up! We have to natural doctors in my areas so everything I’m doing is alone and it’s hard! I told my husband last night that I was ready to quit! I did the AIP diet for about three month a couple of years ago. I stopped when I got pregnant and was so sick that I just had to eat whatever would go down. I am finally starting again now that my baby is 2.
Karli says
Thank you- this was so incouraging!!! My husband and I just started a meat/veggie/fat diet a week ago and it is very daunting… perfect timing for us personally- thank you again!
Jill says
This is so important. We can do all the dieting we want but if our mental or spiritual houses aren’t in order, diet means nothing.
And thank you for sharing that you’re using a professional therapist. Too many people feel “wrong”mentally, but think the answer is to just pop a magic pill. But if we don’t get to the root of what’s wrong, we’re simply masking symptoms. And prayer alone isn’t the answer. Prayer is turning it over to God and asking for His help….but we still need to do the work. Prayer isn’t a magic pill either!
All the best to you in your journey, Laura!
Jaime says
Thank you so much for this! It’s exactly where I’m at. I have hashimotos and I have changed my diet, but with much stress the last few months I’ve stopped taking care of myself. I’m excited to join you for the challenge!
Steph says
Thank you for this post. My youngest (21 months) has allergy to milk and eggs (hives and vomiting). I worry that it’s related to my own problems (leaky gut, maybe?) while I was pregnant. I would like to solve this problem for myself, but I really do struggle with what to tell people someplace with communal eating.
The worst part is that I don’t know my own mind. From my experience, it seems that most of the people who use healing diets solve one problem (“I feel great when I don’t eat gluten!”) only to discover another (“now I have candida and must undertake an even more restrictive diet”) It always seems their health problems are never ending! So I can sympathize with people who think that anyone who undertakes a healing diet is doing it as part of a fad, rather than really healing. Yet I believe to my core that our diet is our health–hence the struggle.
So, back to when I’m eating communally. I like to politely bring my own food, and if pressed mention that I’m avoid ‘xyz’ and hope to leave it at that, but I’m sensitive to the fact that a lot of people think it is absolutely crazy to restrict yourself like that. It even took the signed emergency plan for the epi-pen from the doctor to prove to my own mother that when I said we could not eggs and dairy, it was not “another crazy diet” I had cooked up but an actual requirement to avoid an allergic reaction in my child.
It is very helpful to see someone who struggled with feeling worse and worse and finally turned a corner–it is really such an encouragement.
Melinda Johnson says
Oh, Laura, I feel the same way right now! I’ve been taken off gluten, dairy, and eggs. And my stomach is so much better, but it hasn’t helped my fibromyalgia pain. I, too, see a naturopath and have seen a counselor in the past. But your post is so encouraging to me to keep trying and really work on the spiritual and emotional side of things. I’ve been following your journey for 7 years or so. I’m so glad you can “cheat” once in a while. There is hope! Thanks for sharing!
Amber says
I think our food system is so broken that so many of us are getting sick. Even when you try to eat healthy most of the time, it is impossible to avoid GMO’s and pesticides. Plus our soil is being depleted and our livestock is not being fed according to the laws of nature. So many people can no longer tolerate grains (myself included). I know we are designed to eat grains because it is in the bible! But something has happened either to the grains or our bodies (or both!) that we can no longer eat them without getting sick. Our insulin levels are too high, our omega balance is off, and our gut linings are deteriorating. Sometimes it feels like the world in the Lorax. Companies are slowly destroying the earth. But there is hope through grass roots movements. People are learning to cook and garden. Some people are becoming political environmental activists. I believe the LORD is calling us to do our part.
Serenity Summers says
I’m just really proud of you, Laura. It’s so much easier to cover up our struggles instead of wrestling them out. I hope you continue to heal in all ways:).
tammy says
Thank you Laura for your honesty. It is encouraging to see there can be light. Praise God for that Light.
Lana says
God Bless you Laura!! I’m thankful you are getting the healing you need. You are an inspiration to mothers and a great example of Titus 2 truths. I have no doubt the enemy wants to tear that down. Strong godly families are his downfall. Covering you in prayer as you continue to bless your family and beyond!
Carrie Crowl says
Laura, I am completely touched by your transparency. I think our physical and mental health is completely related. I am so happy to hear that some healing is taking place. May our Heavenly Father bless you and your family. I have been reading your blogs for quite a long time now. I appreciate your humor and you encourage me to eat healthier. You’re my favorite blogger to read. Thank you for all you do. I’m praying for you and your health.
Your sister in Christ,
Carrie
Rebekah Walden says
Thank you for this post. I have been eating healthier the last 4 years and at first lost about 12 lbs. Due to some hear issues i am on heart meds and the can cause weight gain. I have regained my 12 plus a few more. I am everyday so careful about what I eat but so discouraged that the scale doesn’t move in the right way. I have thought just go back to eating what you want but I know that isn’t right. I will continue on. God bless you for all you do.
Bethany Lotulelei says
Rebekah, I am so sorry you have been discouraged! Don’t give up! It is not all about the scale. Eating healthy is benefiting your body in so many other ways. You are doing a great job!
Bethany (Laura’s assistant)